I’d be the first one gone in a horror movie

 

Today was supposed to be a 6 mile run, but because I’m behind on my schedule I did 5.  Lets just be honest about it, I couldn’t do 6 miles today if Freddy Kruger were chasing me down at midnight.  I couldn’t get over an 11 minute mile to save my life.  I’d be more depressed about my lack of ability if it wasn’t for the fact that a 5 mile run hasn't happened in a long time, so it made me feel slightly more accomplished than, oh say, Snooki or Lindsay Lohan.  I had to keep bouncing back and forth in my music to find songs to keep me going after the first 2 miles.  But at least I can say that it’s done.  So BOO YA!!!

Totally winning!!!

 

 

When I was young and dreamed of having kids I didn’t really thing through the thought of them getting older.  That dream always involved a baby but never the older child.  Well, I had a reality check yesterday.  My oldest daughter turned 6!!!  I think I actually saw her get older yesterday right before my eyes.  And she didn’t even ask permission.  In fact I’ve been telling her for years to stop growing, but does she listen?  It’s quite rude of her to disobey her mother.

What a ham.  Always posing!!!

We had a bowling party at a local place with the other little girls from her Kindergarten class as well as some cousins who are around her age.  It was pretty fun…for her.  I spent most of the time pondering how quickly this all seemed to happen.  Over all I thought it went well and Little girl #1 said it was “Awesome”.  (I know, I throw a great party!!!)  After the may lay was over I have to settle the bill with the server who did an amazing job keeping the drinks filled and the pizza around.  Somehow I got it in my head that the bowling lanes were $10 per lane per hour, which would have totaled $40. So when the receipt had double that on it I was a little shocked to say the least.  I ended up getting a manage and arguing for the price I was quoted on the phone until they re-rang my ticket.  Then I got home and double checked the notes I had made while talking with the event coordinator just to confirm that I was right.  Much to my horror I WAS WRONG.  I’ll even say it again cause it doesn’t happen very often, I WAS WRONG. 

It’s hard for me to believe too.

I felt awful, so very, very, awful.  I called my husband who was still out and about and made him go back to tell the server that I was a giant ninny head and was wrong and pay for the rest of the ticket.  Of course, he wasn’t keen on being the one to go but I made sure that he let them know I was the one who screwed this up.  I guess I’ll never be able to show my face there again.  I’ll have to change my hairstyle and speak in a British accent so they won't know who I am if I ever go back.

 

Don’t you hate it when your wrong????

Eat my shorts Tide!

 

So there are only 3 days until the end of the world my 30th birthday.  If I emerge from my hole on that day and see my shadow, will I get 6 more weeks of being 29?  Seems kosher to me.

Last night I fitted some new orthotics for my running shoes and was super excited to test them out this morning.  To be honest, anything to help with the extreme heel pain I have is exciting. 

I ran 3 solid miles on the treadmill while listening to Pandora-Todays Radio Hits.  The really exciting part was doing the miles consecutively.  I haven’t actually run 3 miles in a row in probably a month.  It’s been a lot of one mile, stop, another slow mile, stop, finish with a mile that can almost be considered speed walking, stop.  So when I managed to keep a 10:45 pace for 3 solid miles I was stoked.  I know, small victories.  It was just nice to not feel like I was going to die.  Even enjoyable for treadmill work.

Or I could just give up and use this.

 

Yesterday I also tried my hand at making my own laundry detergent.  Don’t laugh, I’m just really cheap, and my kids have sensitive skin that requires no dyes or perfumes.  I must have given birth to delicate flowers.  Anyway, it was a fairly simple process that involved melting a bar of soap that had been through a cheese grater.

 

 

 

 

Then you mix a cup of borax and a cup of washing soda and water and let sit.  I also added some baking soda just for good measure.  I researched a bunch of different recipes but they were mostly the same, so I have a feeling that I may play around with it to get it the way that I like it the best. 

 

But the best part is the money savings.  Like 0.01 a load as opposed to 0.18-0.20 a load.  And we do a lot of laundry in this house.  I also made some powdered dishwasher detergent too.  Insert jokes here about my frugalness.

My ultimate goal is actually to be able to buy more running crap.  Don’t tell my husband!

 

It’s also this baby girls 16th birthday.  I really feel old now.  Happy birthday to my niece, Ali!

Sweaty and Questionable

 

Isn’t if funny how you run into all sorts of people you know when you are sweaty and gross and possibly smell questionable?  Well that has happened to me today.  I had a 4 hour class at work which got over slightly early.  At which time I decided to use my time wisely and hit the gym.  Now the middle of the day is not my usual time for working out and as it turns out there are a lot of people that I know that choose the middle of the day to use the gym.  As you know I like to go when the '”Silver Sneakers” are there, but over the lunch hour is a much younger crowd.  Crapsticks!!

Anyhow, I ran 3 miles on the treadmill much to my surprise. (I had only told myself, “You only have to do one today.”)  and then finished out my hour of cardio on the elliptical.  All the while people I know, who are more fit than I by the way, felt the need to flaunt their physical prowess and make me feel like an overstuffed sausage in my running tights.  That's right, Sarah, I’m talking to you, you skinny little woman.  I will snap you in two.  By the way Sarah and I share a birthday that just around the corner.  Feel free to get us presents or shower us with cash.

Smile now Sarah, I’ll get you when your not looking.

This past weekend my mom and I went Antiqueing/Goodwilling.  It was fun had by all and I even found a few things for myself.

This horse resembles a horse in my mom’s attic that me call ‘Ol Blue.  They wouldn’t let me ride him.

I let my mom pick her own outfit out at Goodwill.  We are just gonna have to buy her clothes for her from now on.

We did have the find of the year.  A pair of brown leather, barley worn, Ralph Lauren Kitten heels.  And not the Chaps brand of Ralph Lauren, the actually, “I’m too expensive to actually spend money on” Ralph Lauren shoes.  They are a size 9 so these big old feet aren’t getting into them but I bought them anyway and am going to make my sister wears them since she has smaller feet than I.  You just can’t pass up that kind of deal for $3.50.

I also thought that I found a library table that I could use as a desk but the dolls that were guarding it wouldn’t let me have it so I backed off.

Though I have not found the desk I have been looking for.  I have now resorted to Craigslist and hope that the desk that I am going to see tonight is not a trap where I will end up stuffed into someone's basement and forgotten about.  So if you don’t hear from me in a few days you know I’m in someone's basement on the East side of Terre Haute.

Dear Mucus,

 

You are no longer welcome in my respiratory system.  You will be asked to evacuate the premises with in 24 hours or face certain destruction by means of fire bomb or guillotine.  It’s your choice but know this, I will make you my submissive.

Sincerely,

Jess

 

Well now that I have that out of the way maybe I’ll be able to have normal respirations in the near future.  I am so sick of waking up in the morning and hacking, coughing and expelling crap from my nose and throat.  And just when you think that you’ve got it all it starts again.  It’s like a small leprechaun has set up residence in my lungs and is mixing cement down there.

                   PS don’t google the word mucus!

 

So this week getting back in the running game has been slow going but I’m getting there.  I did 1.5 miles on the treadmill and then did some more elliptical work.  I know, I know,  don’t do too much Jess, you’ll over work your self.  Don’t worry, I know how to take it easy.  Don’t want to over work this delicate body.

By the way,  I’m slightly dreading the next 36 days.  It’s the slow death march before the dreaded 3-0.  At which time I’m officially considered old and you can only refer to me as ma’am, at which time I will be drinking geritol and worrying about my bowel movements on a daily basis.  At least I can rejoice in the fact that my sister is always older than me.

 

How old is OLD?