Fat running is hard!!!

 

Thought I would give a quick update on my dangling appendages.  And by dangling appendages I mean my feet and not boobs.  I have faithfully spent the last 2 weeks doing some stretching and rolling of my feet every night involving a tennis ball and a frozen can of cranberry sauce.  I found a great website that has assisted me in my healing process.  At athletes training athletes they really line out how and why and what you should be doing for each type of injury.  Instead of the doctor handing you a sheet of paper you don’t understand and even wonder if he could possibly do the exercises he wants you to do with his big pot belly hanging out.  (Sidebar: I always wondered how a fat doctor could tell me I needed to loose weight or get healthier, uhhhhh, look in the mirror first.) 

 

So anyhoo, after my come to Jesus talk with myself, I got down to business and really have seen some results.  I am by no means pain free but I can get through a day at work and not hobble home on bloody stumps and when I get up in the morning that first step in only uncomfortable instead of feeling like “OMG a shotgun has just blasted through my heel.” 

 

Take note, feet!!!

Now the precarious thought…  When to start back to running.  Do I give it a few more weeks and see if they have more improvement or do I attempt a few very very very short runs and see how they feel? (Of course sitting on my backside has been much easier over all than running 13 miles.)  If only another type of cardio sounded remotely interesting I could abandon running all together.  Who am I kidding,  I am not coordinated enough to swim or bike. We are lucky I am capable of putting one foot in front of the other without falling over every 5th step.  I guess more rest would be better than re-injury…

 

 

On a totally unrelated note, have you tried these…

 

There are no words…. Go out, buy them now.  You can thank me later and I would like to publicly thank my friend Sarah for starting me on my love affair.

Another Potential Embarrassment

 

Fate has been conspiring against me of late.  The foot, the weather, any other excuse I can find to blame my lack of desire to exercise, just insert lame excuse here______.

Today was no different.  It was suppose to be the last long run before next Saturday.  And seeing that it was pouring this morning an outside run was out of the question.  So in all my wisdom I fixed breakfast for the fam and waited until the little ones laid down for a nap to head off to the gym.  Well mistake number one for the day was waking up. Mistake number two was eating a greasy breakfast.  A half a mile into it I started the tell tale signs of the “scoots”, if you know what I mean.  At mile 2 I had to jump of the treadmill and hot foot it to the bathroom (thank God I was inside today and near a lou).   Now you’re thinking, everything is fine…  Well you’d be wrong!!!  The next three miles were spent running with clenched cheeks of terror.  (Why did I pick the treadmill the furthest from the bathroom???)

All I can say is, at least I got in 5 miles.  I couldn’t bring myself to show my face in the gym after a second sprint to the bathroom.  I might have gotten a new nick name if I did ( Madam craps a lot or Senora Scoots).   But it Indy or bust in  7 days.  Watch out fellow runners who may be near me in coral Q, I could need to cut across you to a port-a-pot  at a moments notice.

Thinking of making Jen ride this during the race for me.

Only 3 more days until vacation…Lets make like a baby and head out.

I’m getting a fanny pack

 

Four miles on the treadmill today. Done!!!  And it wasn’t so bad today either.  I managed just under an 11 min mile most of the time and it felt very comfortable.  Maybe things are starting to look up now.  My left heel was fine during the run though I am now at home icing it due to some pain, though not anywhere near where it was pre injection. 

I did have a possible admirer who chose to use the treadmill directly to my right.  He might have been wearing a fanny pack of some sort and kept talking to me even though I was clearly wearing ear buds and singing to my self the entire run.  In fact he spent about 10 min “getting ready” to walk by facing me and fiddling with his ipod (I timed it I know).  I don’t know, maybe fanny packs could be sexy.

I told you it’s sexy. Hey there Steve…

So I broke down and purchased some new work shoes and I’m kicking myself for not doing so earlier.  You never realize how broken down your shoes are until you get some new ones and experience your feet walking on clouds.

These are the shoes (Sauconey Hurricane 14) I am now wearing for my 14 hour work days and I am thinking of marrying them in June.  We plan on making a happy life together.

Now I’m off to make some homemade noodles this afternoon.  Chicken and noodles for dinner. Come on over I’m making mashed taters too!!!

Surprise…

 

There was a time that I had considered myself to be an observant person.  But apparently my grey and aging brain has lost a step.  Crap!!!  There were so many signs earlier in the week, stupid questions from friends, shady dealings with the husband, and people being weird.  I should have seen it coming.  I should have known…

 

 

I didn’t exactly have the reaction that my husband wanted.

 

Big D was pretty bummed that my first reactions was a poor one.  Let’s just be honest, I was a little pissed off.  He took me to dinner and fed me a line about wanting to stop by a party for a friend and that we would just make an appearance.  Well much to my horror I walked into a room filled with a bunch of my so called “friends”.  A real friend might have tipped me off so that I could have washed my hair!!!

Kathy, I know my hair was bad, but you could at least open your eyes and pretend I look good.

Same goes to you Cheryl!!!

At least there was cake.

And this isn’t just any cake, its “Joanne” cake.  Joanne is my best friends mom, who makes cake of many sorts.  In fact she made my wedding cake.  I would do devious things just to get a piece of this cake.  So at least this party had a redeeming factor.  My family also showed up to rub my age in my face.

I don’t understand why my brother couldn’t drive from Florida for this party???? And hey there grizzly Adams.

Smile now.  You know what payback is like?

I have to say that over all I had a good time.  Yes it was a rocky start but I woun’t kill anybody just yet over it.

Don’t do it, you can still eat cake.

I’m just going to have to hone my observation skills and prepare for a counter attack.  You will never know when it will happen oh, husband of mine, but it will happen, and it will be swift and you will be surprised!!!

Rub it in my face, will ya?

Look out 31, here I come.

A personal photographer would be nice

 

Ok, so maybe my prediction of the end of the world on Monday was a little askew, but I still feel old.  I did manage to drag the old decrepit bones out of bed today and to the gym for some TM time.  By the way, I can’t wait for some nicer weather.  That treadmill is going to slowly suck my soul from me.  I have to “formulate a plan, or end up in jail, or shot.” (Thank you Eminem)  But seriously, now that I am actually following a training plan and doing my best to stick with it, I’m going to need to switch it up with some runs in different locals to keep my ADD self interested.

White trash crush, right there.

I did manage the 3 miles that the plan called for today and spent the rest of my hour of cardio on the elliptical.  Today I listened to a new station.  How have I never thought of cueing the Glee radio on Pandora.  Two words: Kill Er.  I need to change my music that I listen to while running as much as I need to change the trail.  I get to board and loose interest. (Is it possible to have ADD and OCD at the same time?) 

Doesn’t everybody know their own Sue Sylvester?

I guess the gym was slightly different today seeing as how it was like running in bar!  A mile into my run Ms. Swisher Sweet hopped on next to me.  At least smoke your cigarette and then change your clothes or something.  The smell was so strong I seriously considered changing treadmills.  But then I was worried about making a scene and possibly hurting someone's feeling.  But then again why should I care because she didn’t care about my nostrils.  I really need to be nicer…

The hubs got me some flowers for valentines day.  Pretty, no?

 

It was Sarah’s birthday too.  She got a pretty nifty sock monkey hat.

I also did go out for my birthday on Monday and met up with some friends at Charlie's, which is a pub where I can get a free hamburger on my birthday.  And since I’m a tightwad we went where the free stuff is.  I had an excellent time and hope to do it again a decade from now before I enter my assisted living facility.

Free fishbowls!!!!

 

Cindy and Amber HOTTTTTT

Apparently when you are having fun, you forget to take pictures. Cause I ain’t got none…

Doomsday Ahead

 

In case you are on of those doomsday peppers', like my husbands wants to be, the end of the world is tomorrow, at 9:40am to be exact.  This will be the time that all time stops and I shrivel up into a prune like appearance and can be considered old.  At least Little Girl #1 says 30 is old, and I believe her, she doesn’t tell fibs at all, ever, never, sometimes Ok so she has questionable judgment when it comes to telling age. 

Hey I’m willing to accept jewelry in order to fill the hole in my psyche.

My last day at 29 though hasn’t been that bad.  After church today we split the family up.  Big D brought the girls back to the house to be feed and watered and shut in their stalls for sleepy sleepy time.  And I went to the gym and ran 3 miles, much to my surprise.  Mentally I had wanted to run 3 but wasn’t sure what would happen since (TMI) my uterus really hurts.  But I digress…  Pandora didn’t let me down and provided a great soundtrack to help take my mind off…other things.

I am really in love with this York Peppermint Patty creamer.  It’s only second behind my love for Coconut Coffee creamer.  Then I had a revelation, what if they made a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup creamer?  I don’t think I would ever drink anything else, ever again.

You think it would be wrong to just throw one in each cup of coffee and let it melt?

 

OK, now it’s time to enjoy the last few hours of youth that I have left.

Let’s get this vacations going…

 

Two weeks without work started today.  This staycation was kicked off right with a 3 mile run on the treadmill at the gym.  And if my diabolical plan goes well, I will be back on track for my half marathon by the end of the two weeks.  I’ve been pretty lazy the last few month about training and I can really tell.  I can measure it too, on the scale… 

I’m just as shocked as you Hector.

I also have dealt with annoying heel pain for the last 5 years off and on.  Of course it is worse with running but I’ve always pushed through.  Well the last couple of weeks I have literally wanted to cut my left foot off my body to make the pain go away.  I am seeing a podiatrist about it but he has me putting a cream on my heels 4 times per day and taking an anti-inflammatory twice daily and I can’t always remember to do those things and take my Alzheimer's medications.  I’m just wondering if there is maybe something more going on that heel spurs.

He really would, I don’t understand why he likes my feet so much.

 

On the way home this morning I was stuck behind a woman in a BMW driving at warp speed (18 mph) while talking on a cell phone.  Road rage could be a small problem that I have that is only brought about by other stupid drivers.  Really lady, lets be extremely rude and obnoxious while possibly causing a wreck.  GET OFF YOUR PHONE.  Just drive.  It can wait.  And if it can’t wait pull over!

She must have read these…

 

 

My salad made me feel better.  Too much avocado?  I didn’t think so.  And yes gold fish are a viable substitute for croutons.  Especially when you have a 2 year old who sits in your lap while eating and wants to pick at your food too.  Bingo bango, they pick the gold fish.  And don’t worry I topped that bad boy off with some ranch dressing.  It was delicious.  Probably not as nutritious that way, but defiantly delicious.

 

 

 

Here is to hoping that might foot doesn’t fall off in the morning…

Moonshine

 

Just as I was walking into the gym today my friend Tena gave me a ring and asked pleaded physically forced me to meet her and a few other friends for a lunch outing.  And you know how much I hate to eat, so I sucked it up and agreed to go.  I ran 2miles on the treadmill and spent another 30 minutes on the elliptical.  Time well spent, I’d say.  I did manage to get a shower in before meeting the girls at an undisclosed location.  We then spent the next 40 minutes driving to an out of the way place that Tena had heard about on the the travel channel.  Moonshine, IL.  You heard of it?  Yeah, me neither…

 

Welcome to Moonshine, Population “2”.  It seemed safe enough, there weren’t any dueling banjos playing or anything.  It’s not often that you can capture a whole town in a photo from your phone.  And this is the whole town.

I’m pretty sure that Cheryl is threatening Kathy that if this sucks she is gonna get it.

I will say that this place really surprised me.  Now there weren’t any tables, or menus, or silverware, but it was SOOOOOO good. The restaurant is called “Moonshine” oddly enough and they specialize in the “Moonburger”.  I can not express to you how delicious this burger was.  I could have eaten two if it was considered socially acceptable.

This is the WHOLE store.  Please note, no tables.

Cindy and Tena enjoying their burger, and the décor. Notice the boxes lining the walls. I think Cindy might be seizing.

It was to delicious to remember to take a pic before eating.  I topped mine with cheese, onion, pickles, horseradish, and spicy mustard.  Don’t judge.

Don’t stop eating girls, it’s just a picture.

And if you want to use the bathroom I hope that you a comfortable with a porta potty cause that’s all they got.

And I’m ok with that.

Over all a great trip, unexpected but wonderful.  I highly encourage anyone to take the out of the way trip.

On a side note my friend Amanda, who coincidently has a cute little blog about decorating and organizing and cooking and whatever else she wants to cause that’s how she rolls, sent me a message telling me that my blog is a blocked site at her work because of content.  Who me?  It must be all the references to crap.  I’m so proud to be a rebel causing discord at the places of work of those 5 people who read this drivel. 

 

Have you been a rebel lately?

What the heck is wrong…

 

with me, in particular?  For starters with all the holiday hubbub running has been last on the list.  I then relate my crappy state of mind, and subsequently body, to this lack of exercise.  I always feel so much better about myself after getting moving and that just isn’t happening lately which really sucks a big one. 

And this week isn’t looking any better on the running front.  How do other mothers actual fit in regular exercise of any kind?  I usually have a kid attached to one hip or the other and the other child making requests in every 15 minutes to keep me on my toes.  Then with what time might be left after them going to bed I’m to tired to load the dishwasher.  I feel burned out.  Excuses, excuses, I know.  Just shut up and run.

When I find so motivation, or win the lottery, I’ll let you know.

Fasting from Running

 

Did I mention I have to work tomorrow?  Well I do.  Somebody has to take care of the sick people.  I plan of eating at least 5 lbs of any chocolate substance to make it through the day.  It should add nicely to the additional weight that I’ve been packing on during my fast from running.  That’s what I’m calling it to make myself feel better about not running.  I’m really fasting. Totally for religious reasons.

My poor niece Ali was tired from watching little girl # 1 & 2 all night.  She’s thrilled!!!

I plan on getting back on the running wagon soon.  But in order to make it more of a challenge I think that I should gain a few more pounds.  I wouldn’t want those other people to feel bad at the gym if I showed up in excellent physical condition and they were just starting on their new years resolutions.  So it’s my new years resolution to not get too in shape to aid in others high self esteem.  Sound good?  Yeah, maybe not so much.

Regardless,I do plan on eating a crap ton more before the new year.  And crap ton is way more than a regular ton or a metric ton.  Look it up! I dare you. 

 

Do you plan on being bad over the holidays?

Piso Mojado

 

Let me just start by saying that sick kids are not fun.  I deal with enough bodily fluids at work I don’t particularly want to deal with it at home.  But today has been full of it, bodily fluids that is.  And if everything goes as the little buggers planned, I’ll be the one ralphing my guts up tomorrow.

Their germs are not this cute.

So while I feel good lets reminisce about my massive Thanksgiving dinner last Saturday. Here is the run down, we had turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, sweet potato casserole, green bean casserole, stuffing, cranberry sauce, rolls and for dessert a pumpkin pie and a delicious concoction that my niece put together involving cream cheese and dough (Heaven!!!)

We always take aerial photos from our helicopter for Thanksgiving.

 

The rest of the family was already in a turkey induced coma at this point.

 

 

Sopapilla Cheesecake Heaven.

 

It was a free for all of eating, and I probably had to unbutton my pants when all was said and done.  There might have been some wine involved during the feast.  I may or may not have had spent some too much time with my sister watching old music videos on you tube and singing too loud.

We also spent half the night yelling “Piso Mojado” at anyone who walked through the kitchen.  Listen, the floor was wet and we didn’t want a lawsuit.

 

What happens at your house after all the eating is done?