Sleeping in would have been nice

 

No school today in celebration of those veterans who are currently serving or who have served in the military to protect our freedom. (Thanks, by the way)  So what do my kids do to celebrate? Wake up at 6:50am, run in screaming and demand a parade!  Seriously?!?!?!  My crazies never get up early, NEVER.  So what the heck?  Oh, yeah Grandpa promised a veterans day parade.

I sooooo want a motorcycle.  I would look so cool and you know it.

So after bundling the kidos up for a 34 degree parade and dropping them off with Gramps I headed to the gym feeling foxy.

With some Jay-Z & Lincoln Park on a Pandora station I got rolling in treadmill hell.  It felt better than it had in a long time, a really long time.  And after 4 miles I was spent.  I realized that I hadn’t gone 4 miles in a long time and it was pretty nice.  It was one of those runs that reminded me that I do like running, sometimes. 

Now that being said, I did have a slight breakdown around mile 2 that was not related to running.  I was positioned at a treadmill under a TV, of course every TV is tuned to a news channel so I find myself watching national news to the tune of Jay-Z in my ear.  As I find my eyes wandering upwards to the screen I became entranced by a scene of two veterans, who are up there in age, carrying a wreath with the assistance of a marine in full dress at a monument (not sure where since I couldn’t hear).  The marine then placed the wreath down, the three men saluted each other and then turned and walked away.  So by the time it took me to watch that 2 minute clip I was a sobbing mess while running.  I’m sure the geezer next to me walking off his ensure was trying to figure out what was wrong or if he should find another treadmill.  But I pulled it together and finished my run strong and tried to avoid eye contact with the TV again.

After pulling myself together and washing the stink off, I made it down to the opening of the Qdoba that opened this week for lunch with big D.  Terre Haute is hitting the big time.  I know you want to move here, don’t all come at once.

DJ’s choice of steak burrito.

My naked chicken taco salad. yum…

It was a little bit of heaven in the middle of the day.  And yes that is guacamole and sour cream.  Those should be their own individual food groups.  I just might campaign for that with the FDA.

And by the way it’s hard to type when you have this on your lap.

Little girl #2 likes to cuddle.

She was simultaneously eating out of two different bags of goldfish as evidenced by the crumbs on her shirt.  I’m raising very polite, clean, sanitary individuals. 

Maybe I shouldn’t do chili

 

After a VERY LONG 12 hour day at work, I did something that hasn't been done in weeks, perhaps months.  I went to the gym.  Now don’t get all excited it didn’t really go as well as I dreamed.  But that’s what you get for still thinking that you’re a young, fit, skinny, active individual.  When you are actually (cringe) old, overweight, out-of-shape, craptastic individual you can’t just get out there and run 26.2 miles.  Crazy, I know! 

You two just wait till high school, I can’t wait to ruin everything.

 

The plan went like this: run 3 miles and then lift weights on the arms for 30 minutes.  After 2.6 seconds on the treadmill reality set in and someone pulled the chain for the light bulb over my head.  It just wasn’t gonna happen.  I had hastily scarfed down a small cup of chili around 5:30pm or so to that I wouldn’t be famished and running.

By the time I got on the treadmill at 8:00pm it seemed that it had been good planning.  BUT I couldn’t breath, and my stomach cramped.  I was a hot mess.  It was the kind of breathing that I thought would ease after a little bit so I pushed through to a half a mile. (I know, I suck, keep you comments to yourself.) The half mile point is usually when things level out and I feel ok.  Well, that’s when it got worse today.  I had the feeling like when your pregnant and your uterus is so full of baby that there is no more room in your belly and your lungs have no where to expand.  That’s a feeling I really don’t want to remember.  So a mile was all I could handle before I was lightheaded. 

So on to plan B.  Lift some heavy stuff for a while and hope that no one really looks at you and figures out that you don’t know what your doing.  And that’s what I did for the rest of my time.

Thank you little girl #1, I knew I could count on you.

 

I pretty much deserved to be stoned for my lack of ability, but I guess its better than doing nothing after work.  So tomorrow I will attempt to bet fit all over again.  If you want to come watch me and heckle that would be great.  Any type of reinforcement, positive or negative, is much appreciated.

Treadmill Marathon

 

Yep, today was even more difficult than yesterday when convincing myself to get moving in treadmill hell but it’s done and that makes me happy.  Two craptastic miles in the books and then another 30 minutes on the elliptical.  DONE!!!  Now the questions is do I get up at the butt crack of dawn and work out before work, drag myself after work or just avoid it all together tomorrow?  It remains to be seen.  Now if that darn bowl of candy would quit calling my name…

If only that were true, I’d have the best teeth ever.

Is it good to eat a diet high in peanut butter?  If so then I’m really healthy.  In fact I must be the poster child for health. Or not. 

Have you ever considered running an entire marathon on the treadmill.  Yeah, me neither, but go watch this video from Tosh.0 about a treadmill marathon.  The beginning is a depressing view of two women trying to finish an ironman and crawling across the finish which leads to the idea for the actual treadmill marathon. 

Tosh.0
Get More: Tosh.0 Videos,Daniel Tosh,Web Redemption

The Kenyan cracks me up every time.  I don’t think he has ever ran on a treadmill before.  But this might be the only way that I ever run 26.2 miles.  I would need some poor sap who would have to run right next to me and couldn’t leave my side and would have to listen to me complain the whole time.

 

What do you think about a treadmill marathon?

Treadmill Purgatory

 

Seems like the beginning of every run, or workout for that matter, is a struggle.  I struggle for the desire to do anything, I struggle for the desire to keep going, and once I’m done I am dreading the next day when I have to do this all over again.  It’s not suppose to be like this!!!  Where is that fire I use to have for getting up and getting moving?  Lately, I just suck.  Though it probably doesn’t help that I have been only able to workout every 3 days or so.  (Stupid 12 hour job!) It seemed like it was easier when the weather was nice.

Take today for example.  I made it to the gym by 8:30am-ish and then sat in the locker room talking myself into getting out there. Then once I pulled my large butt off the locker room floor and took the steps necessary to get going I ended up on an elliptical first for around 20 minutes just talking myself into running.  It didn’t help that there was a young, skinny, fit, and pretty girl running her back side off right next to me at warp speed.  After deciding to make the leap over to treadmill purgatory I could only do 3 miles before crumpling into a depressing heap back in the locker room. 

Did I mention the whole time I was running I stared at a gray sky, pouring rain?  It really was a spirit booster!  I’m going out on a limb here and conclude that my aversion to working out lately has to do with a combination of things.

1. I‘m in a rut.

2. I don’t have any workout buddies.

3. I think I’m having a midlife crisis.  (I will be 30 soon)

And we all know it’s easier to complain about things instead of changing them, so I’m gonna keep complaining for the time being until divine intervention happens and fixes one of the above. 

Maybe at this point I should be seeking some professional help.  But who can afford that?  I’ll just continue hating running until I like it again… Yeah, that might work.

Dumb Socks

 

There was a plan in my head this morning to run 5 miles.  It was a lovely plan that a better trained individual would have been able to accomplish.  But this idiot has early onset Alzheimer's and didn’t remember what happened yesterday.

Special thanks to Under Armour for the crappy socks that have all ripped in the exact same spot!  Loved the colors ( it was a multi-color pack).  Not so much how they have held up over the last 6 months or so.  So after feeling that same spot rub again today I gave up after 3 miles and walked another 25 minutes.

On the bright side, I feel like a hard core runner who can run through injury.  Not…  I did manage to lift with the old arms since that didn’t irritate my feet.  Bonus!

 

Then after a special gym shower I hot stepped it over to Aldi’s for some cheap groceries.  In case you don’t know what Aldi’s is, look it up.  Its for the cheapskates like me who don’t care about brand.  But what I forgot is that it is the beginning of the month.  Catch my drift?  The grocery store should be avoided like the plague the first few days of every month.  I won't elaborate because I won't be able to say anything nice.  So instead I decided to take some notes while at Aldi’s and then when I stopped by Wal-mart for some other extras.

 

Things that piss me off while shopping

1.  Please when shopping stay to the right while in the lane. Don’t swerve all over the aisle and act like you’re the only one shopping here.  Grow up and have some manners.

2. When checking out with your cart load of crap please don’t actively complain about the person in front of you and how much they are buying.  It’s rude.  What makes you so superior to me?  I have 2 children and a husband to buy groceries for,  that may require more food than you need for you and your cat.  If you want to check out quicker go to the self check lane.

3.  Do we really need to be playing Christmas on November 2?  Can we celebrate Thanksgiving first? OK, thanks.

4. What are you gonna do with a cart full of O’Douls?  Get really crazy and perhaps play a game of UNO?  I know I want to be invited to that party.

5. Please come fully dressed when entering the public eye.  That’s all.

 

Things that make me happy while shopping

1.  Special thank you to the cart pusher at Wal-mart who made my day when I heard you sing at the top of your lungs while pushing the carts inside.  Who knew that a teenager would be listening to Meatloaf's “Anything for love”?  Score!!!

2. I love to shop by myself.  It’s like a small fieldtrip where I can wander around and not have to answer this question 800 billion times, “Can I have that, please?”

Buy me some shoes, NOW!!!

 

So, this morning I came to the realization that I go back to work on Thursday for 3 days in a row.  Suck!!!  I did manage to get in 3.4 miles on the treadmill in about 36 minutes and then spend the rest of the hour I had planned walking at a 5.0 incline. I am determined to do at least an hour of cardio 4 days a week.  It’s really time to pick up the pace if I expect these legs to look better.  And I also decided that I need a goal to keep me focused and on track ( no pun intended).  So, soon I will be researching some local races and decided which one to grace with my presence. And if you feel like going with me feel free.  It would be nice actually to have someone be my running friend. (Disclaimer: you must be a slow turd to run with me)

 

  I also realized while stretching after running today that my shoes are pretty much spent.

Where there used to be tread on my shoes, it is nice and flat.  The heel doesn’t look much better.  If I use my average mileage since I started running in these shoes I’m at around 330 miles give or take a few.  I guess they aren’t gonna make it to 500.  So, who wants to get me some new Brookes?  Great! Thanks!

 

Did I mention that I really don’t want to weigh myself ever again?

 

PS. That candy is yelling at me from the kitchen.  It calls my name and whispers sweet nothings in my ear.  I will do my best to deny it’s calling but I don’t think I can hold off for long.  I’m loosing my grip by the minute.

Ok, maybe I can wait a few more minutes…

 

In case you live under a rock, Jessica Simpson is preggers, so that makes me feel better that a skinny person is getting fat right now.

And can you believe that another person who is famous for not a whole lot is filing for divorce after only 72 days?  I know, I’m in shock.

Easy Kim, those look a little leathal.  Hey, I can’t blame her.  She’s hot and making profit on it.  I’d do the same thing if I could…

Beauty & the Beast

 

This staycation has not been all it’s cracked up to be.  I’m pretty sure there has been some weight gain, but seeing I have a current aversion from the scale at present I don’t exactly know.  The whole running thing hasn’t been top priority for me these last two weeks and my jeans are fitting a bit differently. Epic Fail.  On the bright side yesterday was Halloween.  And you know sugar cures all ills.

 

Alright girls, go get em.

We decided to go to the mall for trick or treat last night.  It’s warm, it’s friendly, and it gives you the most bang for your buck in the candy crop. And it was a bumper crop, let me tell you.  I should have taken a picture of it.  I have two giant Tupperware containers full of it.  Watch out bathroom scale, I’m coming for you.

 

 My feelings exactly!

In case you didn’t get it, Little Girl #1 is Beauty and Little Girl #2 is The Beast.  But since they don’t sell “Beast” costumes we purchased the next closest thing which is a Lion.  It works, I think.  I should have taken a picture of their faces at the end of the night.  Make up everywhere!!!

Big D and I didn’t dress up cause were cheap like that and we can also just steal the candy from the little ones when they aren’t looking anyway.  Bonus to having kids!

 

So did you dress up as anything for All Hallows Eve or do you choose to steal the candy from the children?