Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Do Frogs get Squatters Rights?

 

Why can’t I get on a routine? Geesh Louish, I need to join the military where my day is laid out for me and I don’t really get to choose what to do or where to go, those guys have routine down pat.

 

Jessfart

The Run:

I made it to the gym by 8:00am today which means I got to feel like the super athlete next to all the blue hairs.  It was something like three 10 minute miles or ten 3 minute miles.  Let’s just leave it at, it felt like a lot.  After that agonizing 30 minutes I managed to perform a 20 minute elliptical interval workout that left my butt feeling like mush.  That’s a good feeling in case you were wondering.  During said workout I abandoned music for the Bob & Tom radio program.  I just wonder if people wonder what's going on in my head when I’m laughing out loud while running. “That girl is crazy, don’t go near her” or “I’m never getting on a treadmill next to that one again”. Probably. 

 

The Crap:

Why are sports bra’s so unflattering?  You have two breast that you would rather look like one?

 

 

uniboob

I’m just oozing sex. Can you see it?

What ever happened to lift and separate?  Maybe I might feel a little better about my self if I didn’t feel all squashed and confined.  Thanks “sports bra” for being such a jerkface.

 

There is a squatter on my property.

frog

I assume you’ve mailed the check?

It’s his third summer rent free in my white trash pond.  He runs when ever the landlord gets near and always has a great excuse why he can’t pay. “I’ve got kids”, “I lost my job”, “Stripping doesn’t pay as well as it used to”.  I don’t care amphibian, you could at least eat some flies for us.

1 comment:

  1. I still haven't ran since Morton, I agree 100 percent on the sports bra and...let's try and catch that frog this weekend when I'm there and question him.

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