Monday, August 29, 2011

Chaffing Woes


After 5 days of being lazy and avoiding exercise, today was the day to jump back in the game with 6 long, slow thigh chaffing miles.  It was beautiful outside this morning. 68o and a light breeze.  Loved it.  It has been so hot this summer that being outside had not been one of my favorite pastimes.


I started out super slow and ended with just kina slow, but what’s new? It was an out and back so I decided that I wanted to do the back a little bit faster. So the first 3 miles were around 11:15 min miles and the last were closer to 10:45 miles.  They were stupid slow miles but I felt good doing them considering it has been so long since running this week.


Don’t be jealous of my doo rag, I know you are.

The only problem was the chaffing to the big girl thighs.  I used my body glide but perhaps not liberally enough considering I was wearing shorts today.


This sucks a big one but I only started feeling it the last half mile so at least I wasn’t miserable the whole time.  And this guy is never any help.  He’s too old to run with me.


Once I got home I made my self an egg, mushroom, and green onion scramble (cause I can’t perfect the omelet) and of course added some toast with butter.  How else is a girl suppose to eat some eggs?  Is it lazy that I cut up my veggies with kitchen scissors? I like to think it makes me frugal with my time. You know instead of getting out the cutting board and knife and all that cleaning…


I hope that the 2nd birthday is as smashing as the 1st.  Pun intended.

Today I plan on the beginning of deep cleaning the house for the 2 year old birthday party that will be here Saturday. There is so much to do and so little time to do it in.  I may be bald in my next post due to stress related anxiety.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Howl at the Moon


The last two days have been spent in Indy.  For those who don’t know what that is, it is short of Indianapolis, IN.  I love it there.  It’s almost like being in Chicago, slightly smaller and less wind.

living in Indianapolis

Downtown Indy and the Canal, I love this place!

I went to IU Methodist Hospital for a 2 day Med/Surg review course.  It was a class to get me ready to take a really big expensive test so I can say I’m a “Certified” Med/Surg nurse and add a few extra letters to the end of my name.  IU always puts on really good courses on all sorts of different topics, so I was really looking forward to this class.

They provided some “light” reading material for us as a study aid.



I have to say that the class was very educational, but LONG.  It felt like being in school all over again except we didn’t get a recess.  I need my recess!  All the speakers knew their stuff and I felt that I received the information I needed but with that being said they were not all the most interesting speakers.  They had one speaker that said “um” 467,000 times throughout an hour. She might have been a little nervous.  It made me want to pull my eyeballs out with toothpicks. Blunt toothpicks.


Now I get to figure out which nursing association I want to test through, pay close to $400 and take a 175 question test.  Then guess what? If I don’t pass I’m out the money and have to pay to take the test again.  I’m gonna go with passing the darn thing on the first time around.  This cheapskate is freaking out!



I went with some other co-workers and had a really good time. Even if there was some snoring going on…



Don’t hate me girls…

We stayed at a super awesome Homewood Suites by Hilton in downtown Indy right near the city circle.  I stole this pictures from the Hilton web site, the only difference in our room was that we had two queen sized beds instead of the king.  I am currently thinking of moving into this for an apartment, I am in love.

Homewood Suites by Hilton Indianapolis-Downtown, Indiana

Homewood Suites by Hilton Indianapolis-Downtown, Indiana


It was not near Payton Manning’s house though.


It’s ok Payton, we’ll catch up later.

We met some friends at Howl at the moon, Payton couldn’t come, but it was super dee dooper crazy fun.  I’d never been before and it was just around the corner from our hotel.  It’s a doling piano bar and they are crazy, I requested some Beastie Boys and they rocked it out! They even have audience participation at times.  If you ever get a chance to go I highly suggest it.  I plan on going back for my birthday. (I hope someone reads this who is gonna plan my birthday)


We got there pretty early for a good table but later into the night those empty table were packed and it was pretty tight in there.  But the atmosphere was lively and I would have loved to stay longer but we had to be up the next day to go to the Med/Surg class.

Needless to say I really didn’t have time to run.  I took all my running gear and had planned to run the canal if time allowed but between being in class for 9 hours and traffic in downtown around construction I had no time.  That sucked but what are you gonna do?  Life will go on.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Watching Jiggly Bits


After waiting most of the morning for the cable guys to show up and spend exactly 17 minutes hooking up a DVR box and a attaching a phone cord to the wall my day was pretty much spent.  It then took me another 30 minutes to just figure out how to program the remote to the TV. 

baby1 Confused? Just Watch theTape


I need to hire my own IT department for this kind of crap.

After checking the radar and finding a massive storm system coming right at me I decided that maybe I didn’t want to get hit by lightning today.  So yet again another day at the gym for this girl.

That’s pretty much an accurate depiction of my own thighs.


I ran at a 0.5% incline. The first 4 miles were at a 10:30 pace and the last half mile I did at 10:00 pace.  It was a really comfortable run.  I wasn’t pushing it hard at all which was kind of nice.  I have been really sick of being miserable by halfway through my runs.

Is that wrong?


Due to the nice overcast sky outside, I did get to see my reflection in the glass in front of me the whole time.  It’s nice to see all your parts jiggling around for 45 minute, not to mention the weird stares of passers by around me as I sang to myself.  Can’t they just enjoy the concert?

OK so it’s not a baby but it made you laugh.


I’m going to Indianapolis tomorrow for a two day conference with some co-workers for a nursing conference after some family pictures at church.  It’s gonna be a pretty full day.

No Wedgie Zone


Who’s got two thumbs and is waiting for the cable guy to get here?  This girl!  Because I don’t have anything better to do than wait for 2-4 hours for a man to get here and finish work he should have done 2 weeks ago. I’m not bitter, much.


How do you get them to look at the camera and not have that vacant stare?


Yesterday was spent at work for 12.5 hours running around, passing pills, avoiding germs, saving lives, you know real easy stuff.  I really didn’t want to to any physical activity afterwards but I gave myself a little pep-talk about wanting get skinny and some other lies I tell myself to get moving and got by butt over to the gym.  I also use there pictures as motivation:

Someone enjoyed Ms. Bliss’ cookies just a tad much.

Celebrity fat booth iphone app review


Celebrity fat booth iphone app review


fat booth iPhone App Review


Celebrity fat booth iphone app review

Oh technology, you make life so enjoyable and boost my self-esteem at the same time.


It was late, around 8 when I got there and it closes at 9 so there is not much time for anything which is why I got on the elliptical.  I also decided that I should be doing more cross-training type activities to avoid burn out.  Also I brought the wrong shorts to run in and I can’t stand the migration of said shorts on my inner thighs. It just reminds me of the whole rubbing thigh thing that these ham hocks do.

It’s kind of like this. Almost…

I did about 30 minutes before jetting home to eat a bowl of honey nut cheerios and going to bed.  It’s a fabulous life I know. Let’s not get too jealous.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

The Complainers Club



My super skinny, sometimes running partner and fulltime sister Jen and my “Little Brother” Jimmy.

Middle children always get the shaft and feel left out and want some attention.  This could be some hidden reason that I started this blog in the first place.  And in an effort to be “loved” by my family I am bowing to their demands for better pictures of THEM.  Jerks!!!


She is already plotting what she is gonna do to me after this photo.

I remember being entirely tormented by the two above mentioned heathens siblings for most of my childhood.  I blame them for any psychological scars that I have carried into my adulthood and I send them my therapy bills monthly.



How bout I throw you tough guy?

This hunk of meat never really gets into running with us.  Though I do remember a time around 10 years ago when we tried to get him to run with us and he petered out after a mile.  I take this as a victory and like to remind him of it at times.



A race she did without me. How rude!


My sister has been an off and on running partner through out the years.  But she lives 2.5 hours away from me in the flat cornfields of Central Illinois.  And please pronounce it as a singular state.  There are not two Illinois.  There is only one.  Please refer to it as such.


When we get together I go and drag her out with me kicking and screaming the whole time and try to pay her back for those awful childhood years.  In fact, I forced her to do a 10K last month with me and we decided that we should have a club called the “I complained the whole time but did it anyway” Club.  It’s a very selective membership, you probably wouldn’t complain enough to get in.

You Can Now Refer to me as Jessica Biel



How depressing was it to see only 500 calories burned after, what felt like one of my harder runs.  I set the treadmill at 6.0mph and a 0.5% grade.  I ran the first two miles at that pace and on the third mile I decided to increase the mph by a tenth with every tenth of a mile.  So by the end of mile three I was not only running at 7.0mph but I was trying really hard to not let other people see how much I wanted to lay down and die.




Give me a cupcake and no one gets hurt!


The less people that are at the gym the more self conscious I am of how I appear there.  I’d rather be lost in a crowd than the one of three people who were there.  I wish I could have snapped pictures of those who were there.  Mr. Olympia was lifting heavy things and drinking water out of a gallon milk jug all the while adjusting his massive leather belt around his incredibly small waist. He looked nothing like this:



Taylor Lautner shirtless in GQ photos

I like to pretend Taylor Lautner is at my gym.


Another girl got on the treadmill next to me (there were 14 others not in use by the way) and walked at a 3.0mph for exactly 5 minutes then got off to lift less heavy things next to Mr. Olympia.  I know I shouldn’t judge, at least she is there doing something. She also looked nothing like this:



When I grow up I wanna be her.


But the whole time I’m worried they are secretly meeting behind me and cracking jokes about how it looks lie a cockroach scurrying on a treadmill rather than a seasoned runner.


Really Jess? lets quit being so self absorbed, they could care less about you and your lack of skill at self portraits.


IMG_0806             IMG_0807

This is the view from my treadmill.

On weekdays this parking lot is practically full and people are streaming in and out to their respective doctors office.  I like to people watch and decide what their life story is at a glance from 5 floors up.  It’s pretty entertaining.


Lets end with another picture of Taylor so that my picture is not burned into your memory forever.


Why, yes, yes you can.

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Go Ahead and Judge Me


You could classify me as a fair weather runner.




This is what the radar looks like.  Of course match that with 88o weather at 67% humidity and I cave.  That rain is heading in a north eastern direction and I’m not a betting girl.  I pretty much the wimpiest runner I know.  Cold weather and I are better friends.

What the murph is happening here?


I’m gonna run on the treadmill.  You can make fun of me and call me a loser or throw rotten food at me but I melt like sugar in the rain.



So it’s off to the fitness center that makes me feel like I’m at work.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Seriously, Richard!!!


The “gym” that I use when I’m unable unwilling to run outside or in need of some cross-training is actually at my workplace.  This can work to my advantage at times but not in others.  It’s  more of a fitness center, there are treadmills, weights, machines, bikes, and one whole room for exercise classes. (Major bummer: No childcare offered)  There is also some training room with machines that I can only classify as torture equipment.  They say that its for some sort of elite training of athletes.  Maybe I should sign up…



I don’t use much of the gym, just usually a treadmill or a elliptical trainer.  There are times when I use the free weights or a medicine ball.  But that’s sporadic at best.




My favorite is going in the morning when all the little old folks are there lifting 2lbs weights and walking at a 2.5mph on the treadmill.  They are the ones that usually eyeball me when I’m having my own little concert on the treadmill. 


I hate it when Grandma borrows my purple shiny spandex.  They never come back the same.


The drawback of this gym is that it is actually at my workplace.  I get a killer deal and my monthly dues are automatically deducted from my check each month BUT it’s at my work.  So if it’s a day that I don’t actually have to be at work it still feels like I’m going to work.  And who want’s to be reminded of work? Yuck!!!

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

I Need a Coach


Let me just start out with a disclaimer: I hate the smell of a wet corn or bean field. I blame it on the summers spent walking beans and de-tasseling corn here in the blessed Mid-West.  And for anyone who has no idea what I’m talking about can be thankful they never had to walk for endless miles being cut by corn leaves or wear blisters on your hand under the blazing hot sun while literally weeding acres of bean field row by agonizing row.


So what possess me to run out in the country during the summer time where the smells are limited to the above mentioned intermingled with cow, horse, and or pig poo?  I don’t know…


Sorry Ali, I’ll try to be a better Aunt.


But today I ran outside my house (which is mostly back roads country).  I encountered actual horse manure on the road for the first 2 miles and had to hot step it a few times to miss getting a shoe full.  I eventually found the offenders of said poo, but decided against pressing charges when the Vigo County Sherriff drove by at mile 3.5.  I settled for giving their big bowling ball eyes the stare down.  They know how I feel…



Horse eye

Stop looking at me! It makes me nervous.


The first 3 miles were actually pretty good.  I didn’t push hard and settled into a 10:30ish pace depending on if it was up hill or not but around mile 4 the heat all of a sudden turned up and I was dragging.  I got to 5 and walked the mile left back home. 




It hit me though, I hadn’t been running outside a lot and I had almost a week off from running last week so I really wasn’t prepared.  I did take water with me but it was warm by mile 2.5 and I hate that!  I’m a princess, I know. 



I’m really more of a figurehead.


I rocked the Pink Radio on Pandora. (Note for my Mom: Pink is an alternative punk rock girl who’s awesome and this station plays songs from her and other artist like her) I need certain music on certain runs and I don’t always know what kind until I get going, but this selection never fails me.


Pink Reveals Her Baby's Name!

I never looked good or fashionable during a pregnancy.  I also can’t rock that short do without looking like a man, though I would love to try.


I have learned that I really need to get a training schedule and stick with it.  After I finished training for the Indy Mini last May I just kind of try to run willy nilly and random amounts.  It would be better for me to hire a coach who will drag my butt around and tell me how far and what kind of run to do.  But since I haven’t won the lottery or obtained an inheritance from my long lost Aunt Bertha I will just have to settle with making myself do it.



Aunt Bertha looks a lot like my mom with a wonky eye.

I am going to do a little investigation of training plan tonight if I can get the kidos to bed at a decent hour but that plan can go south quickly. I work the next two days, this means me trying to run at the fitness center after working 12.5 hours on my feet.  That could end poorly.


Leroy you never believe what I say.